82 Sri Caitanya-caritamrta [Antya-lila, Ch. 1

PURPORT
Having been very cruel to Srimati Radharani, Krsna is repenting in this way
(Vidagdha-madhava 2.40).

TEXT 152
WaAARVIAH ifaw ea SesTRw
aeacsesteht VAsAts AFA ei Jar + FacHPrsts |
ads carafe qetan 4 ifaw: atalfeaaritfacsi
fra tets Quiros anes Sathya AN! wean

yasyotsanga-sukhasayd sithilita gurvi gurubhyas trapa
pranebhyo ‘pi suhrt-tamah sakhi tatha ydyam pariklesitah

dharmah so ‘pi mahan mayd na ganitah sddhvibhir adhydsito
dhig dhairyarh tad-upeksitapi yad aham jivami papiyasi

SYNONYMS

yasya—of whom; utsariga-sukha-dsayd —by the desire for the happiness of the
association; sithiliti—slackened; gurvi—very great; gurubhyah—unto the
superiors; trapa—bashfulness; pranebhyah—than My life; api—although; suhrt-
tamah—more dear; sakhi—O My dear friend; tatha—similarly; yGyam—you;
pariklesitah—so much troubled; dharmah—duties to My husband; sah—that;
api—also; mahan—very great; maya—by Me; na—not; ganitah—cared for;
sadhvibhih—by the most chaste women; adhydsitah—practiced; dhik
dhairyam—to hell with patience; tat—by Him; upeksita—neglected; api—al-
though; yat—which; aham—l; jivami—am living; papiyasi—the most sinful.

TRANSLATION

“ ‘Desiring the happiness of His association and embraces, My dear friend, |
disregarded even My superiors and relaxed My shyness and gravity before
them. Furthermore, although you are My best friend, more dear to Me than My
own life, | have given you so much trouble. Indeed, | even put aside the vow
of dedication to My husband, a vow kept by the most elevated women. Oh,
alas! Although He is now neglecting Me, | am so sinful that | am still living.
Therefore | must condemn My so-called patience.’

PURPORT

Srimati Radharant is speaking this verse (Vidagdha-madhava 2.41) to Her inti-
mate friend Visakhadevi.
